A True Friend

Okay, so I'm probably the last one on the planet to see this, but I don't care, I thought it was cute; a friend sent it to me in an email, so obviously ignore the "send this to 10 friends" part at the bottom, since I don't expect you to send my blog addy to anyone else.

Are you tired of all those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound
good, but never actually come close to reality? Well, here is a series of
promises that really speaks to true friendship:

1. When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge
against the sorry bastard who made you sad.

2. When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.

3. When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.

4. When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.

5. When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how
much worse it could be and to quit whining.

6. When you are confused - I will use little words.

7. When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well
again. I don't want whatever you have.

8. When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass

This is my oath...I pledge it till the end. Why? You may ask, because
you are my friend. Send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get
depressed because you can only think of nine.

Remember: A good friend will help you move. A really good friend will
help you move a body. Let me know if I ever need to bring a shovel!